girls night in

So last night, was the perfect night in. H was going out with the boys and I had plans with a friend. But then I thought about the day we had planned today... a boutique, the swimming pool, the gym, and then a movie. And then I thought about how I needed to finish some housework and have some alone time before today. Plus I thought last night and all day today might be bit overkill for one friend. So I texted her and said that i was staying in but that we'd continue our plans today. She said great. So I get the house clean, pop me so low cal popcorn, make me a low cal mocktail, and settle down for the ending of the mentalist when H calls. He says 'did you call js?" No why-was my reply. I just wanted to make sure you called her, instead of staying in and watching TV. Seriously? It's your guys night out and your worried about whether or not I hang out with my friend. I dont get him. If I was a recluse and never did anything but watch TV I'd get it. But I am more outgoing than he is. I am always planning parties, and yet he treats me like a person who has no friends. I have more than he does! He actually meets girls at work, and tells them to call me to hang out. Its weird. I'd like to make my own friends. And then he wants to know if I am texting/calling/emailing the girls he "set" me up with. IS this creepy? Because I think it is. Not to mention-it drives me crazy. And whats more...one of the biggest reasons that my galfriends start to act weird around me and him is him. He's off-putting. They've told me. Why cant he just mind his own friend business, and let me handle mine.

seriously...

Thank you Universe. I repaired my car and saved up money to go visit my family and go to my friends shower, and an hour before our destinatiion-H hits an elk. Now we dont have a car. We had to purchase a ticket home. And I will be walking everywhere. I better lose some weight from this!

Gleek

I never thought I'd say this but I am addicted Glee. I am watching season 1 and 2 simultaneously.

Rat Race

I am so sick of the thick grueling race we are all running to try and get ahead. Every year for the past 3 years H has paid hundreds of dollars to take tests, and get scores, and grades, and recommendations sent to schools to apply for a grad program. This year he was put as alternate at three schools that messed up his application-they all said the same thing-he would have gotten in had they realized their error. Then the one school he finally got into estimated 16,000 dollars for a year are turning around and saying that we have to pay 24,000 for the year. ?@#! Seriously, you don't just drop a bomb like that once we accept the offer. It's actually going to be cheaper to go to a private university. The kind that are 'for profit'. What has the world come to? Everyone wants a bigger slice, and a bigger slice. Everything is so competitive, so costly, and for what...a job that maybe might pay 20,000 more. If you are lucky enough to get a job. AAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Guilty Pleasures

We all have them. Those things we love to do, eat, watch, etc when no one is looking. Perhaps we are embarrased by them, perhaps others we know don't like them, or maybe we just enjoy the indulgence because 'we're not supposed to'. Anyhow here is my list of guilty pleasures that get me through life because I enjoy them...too much.

1)This blog. There is something to be said about keeping harmless secrets. I have to erase my history every time I come here least someone I know figures me out...
2)chocolate:cliche-yes. Ruin my diet-sometimes. sinful, indulgent, ecstasy, almost orgasmic-hell yes.
3)wearing things that bother my loved ones. Fashion is so based on perception, taste, trend, and shallowness that sometimes its fun to see someone get their panties in a wrinkle because you wore something they thought was ugly. For example, H thinks anything pink or frilly should be burned-so sometimes I make a point to where it-just to say screw you-I look pretty in pink!
4)shopping-I love looking at beautiful things. What women doesn't and although I know its all unimportant-its still fun to see yourself in something, feel the texture of beautiful cloth, spend a little, walk around the shops, and make a statement. Its how women have exposed their feelings for hundreds of years,
5)pedicures-I'd pay for one every week. I hate dealing with my feet. I'd much rather pay someone else to make them pretty.
6)popular fiction-growing up all i read was literature, literature, and more literature-It was a necessity and a luxury-but then as an adult I started picking things up like sophie kinsella's shopaholic, hunger games, the Host. Silly, entertaining, and distracting. Plus its fun to know what all the talk is about. But of course Jane Austen and Shakespeare still rule my world- this popular stuff is a happy little jaunt.
7)ebay-oh you devil
8)getting my hair styled-I have such unruly hair. I like letting someone else do it.
9)Mandy Moore's latest album-cheesy-but the words get to me.
10)Fish tacos- We are vegetarian at home-so i sneak my fish when H isnt around
11)mochas-I don't need the sugar, caffeine, or milk-But oh how I love it-with a huge dollop of whip cream and cinnamon sprinkles.
12)naps-I never felt guilty about this one until I got married and H thought it was lazy. And now that I have a daughter...well its really hard to squeeze one in.
13)Archer-watch an episode and you'll see what I mean.
now whats yours....

The 4 hour Body

So lately I've been reading alot. Yay! My most recent conquest is the 4 hour body. Its an interesting diet/lifestyle change to say the least. I don't know how many people could live off beans, veggies, and meat 6 days a week. But he says two things that really got me...
"I'm a diet coke whore"
"some women eat peanut butter like a heroin addict"
I plead guilty to both.

confession #6-closet fashionista

Yes. I love fashion. I love cute, beautiful, feminine, charming things. But I also hate it. It costs too much money, and time, and doesn't help humanity. I know. I'm a total hypocrite. But now that we've established that. Lets talk about the things I do like to wear. Recently, I have been into shoes. Probably because its spring, and I need some spring shoes. Also, I am in the process of shedding baby weight and still dont feel thin enough to go shopping for new clothes. Nor do I need any clothes. So I checked out a few websites that let you take a "shoe style quiz" to find your style.
I was very disappointed! Almost none of the shoes were my style. So I decided to find my own.

These are what caught my eye:
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=532053&PseudoCat=se-xx-xx-xx.esn_results

and these
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=532053&PseudoCat=se-xx-xx-xx.esn_results

And the ones listed above. I want florals-neutrals, light pinks. open toes, espardilles, casual and pretty. I like flats and wedges. none of these ridiculous platforms, and spike heels. I am going on spring picnics people. So take that shoedazzle! I can pick out my own shoes.

Shabby Apple Amalfi Coast Swimsuit Giveaway

Shabby Apple Amalfi Coast Swimsuit Giveaway

I am coveting this entire line. These are the reason I continue on my weightloss journey

Dear J;

Dear J,
I love you dearly. You are my family. But I must inform you, that you have hurt me. I know I act like it wasn't a big deal that you told me to break up. But I felt betrayed. Like all you can see in people is church. Are they a church-going person or not? How can you believe in the concepts of love and charity when you don't even live them yourself? You haven't forgiven D. You haven't forgiven H. You always tell me to consider your feelings, to think how you must feel. But just once I'd like you to do that...for anybody. The only grief you ever think about is your own. That's why it haunts you, relentlessly.

sincerely, Coraline.

Confession #5

I hate that I cant really enjoy my religion when H is around. He thinks that he lives on a higher plain than that of religion. But it brings me peace and comfort. I feel like I know who I am, and who the Savior is through it. It really hurts that I cant share that with them. And I tired of feeling looked down upon because of my choice in religious beliefs.

Secret Wish #4

Sometimes I wish so badly that I would wake up with a million dollars. That's probably normal. The weird part is that all I want to do with it is pay off a school loan and put the rest into savings. Oh you recession!

Confession # 4-Real life Arrested Development.

My family is actually like the Bluths, from Arrested Development. My grandfather and his sons embezzled money from their company. My father is alot like Michael Bluth. I guess that makes me George Michael. Yikes. Sometimes I feel like Michael when he is smiling because he thinks he is running away from them forever. I've ran away a few times. When I first watched episode one of the pilot season-my thoughts were...It'd be funnier if it weren't true.

p.s. My sister and brother who are old enough to live on their own moved back in with my parents.

What's your secret?

Tell me your secret and get entered to win a free 30 dollar Amazon gift card! Hurray. Please try to keep your secrets somewhat clean...Otherwise I will edit them for you. To be entered leave your comment, with a link to your blog or email. I will email the winner. If you don't want to post your email, I can have you send me a message through my facebook. In the meantime, share your secrets! I wont tell...

What's for dinner...anything but what you're cookin'

So I often ask H what he wants for dinner and the reply is generally I dont care. But inevitably when I've planned a meal and he asks' what are you making?' The response is usually ,'I dont want that'. So if i want an exact opinion he doesnt have one, and on the things I don't want his opinion, he has a definate one. Damn that murphy's law!

We are building a religion

perhaps you wouldn't guess it from first glance but I am very religious. I was born and raised in a church (which one isnt very important to this post) and I am still an active member of that community. H, however is not. He was raised in the same church, but finds himself disconnected from it. He finds fault with it. The trouble is, he wants me to agree with him. He wants me to read all the same books as him, have the same revelations, feel the same way, in essence experience his experience in the same way. That wouldn't even be possible if I agreed with him. We are different people, with different experiences, different mindsets, different connections to the world, to God, to ourselves. We're different genders for crying out loud. We cannot be the same people. We must live according to the morals, perceptions , and beliefs of our conscience. I hope he may come to a peace, a deep rooted peace that permeates the very harmony of the universe and God to know that he IS. He is divine, and it is enough. For this life it is for us to discover that. I have further beliefs than that, that dictate more, but these will keep us partners and friends. I truly believe that.

secret wish #3

A cruise. Okay. maybe it doesn't need to be secret. But H considers this one of the worst vacation options just before Disneyland. Which I love FYI. But I don't really want to go with someone who is going to be a poo-poo cry baby and whine and complain that we're not doing something more exciting. I want to go on a cruise with my daughter and some of my girlfriends. Maybe even just my girlfriends. I want to get pampered, massaged, pedicured, suntanned, and fed vegetarian gourmet on a platter. I want to dance away to zumba all night. i want to see tropical islands. I want to enjoy silence. Okay ladies-who wants to come with?

Zumba obsession

I've loved zumba ever since my college roommate pulled out the dvd about a decade ago, and invited me to work out with her. I tried to find a class in every city I lived there after, but it wasn't until the last five years, that I could find just about everywhere. I love it, I dance it, I've even taught it a few times, and want to get certified. I know alot about it, but what I don't know is why Grand Rapids, MI produces tons of youtube videos. What goes on in GR? Can I move there? Is it the magical land of continuous dance parties? I am not complaining. In fact, I will share my two favorite coreographers with whom I have a personal zumba date every night via my lappy. Oh the sweet splendor of booty shaking in my knickers.. Glad H isn't around, he would find it both bizarre, and foreign. He just doesn't understand that workouts don't have to include trainers or a running trail.
Here they are Miss Tara from GR, MI


And Miss Mandy from the same-this song is sort of naughty...fancy that JTimberlake!
The best part of this gal's videos is the tall bloke in the corner. You go dude!

Nothing huh?

The S is for sucks! seriously, even with a free a giveaway still no comments? I have got to figure out how to get viewed. Anyways, today was a day that I just was blue. Maybe it was the ominous clouds, maybe the foreboding rain, the cursed inevitable 250 dollar repair on my POS car. The fact that I've only lost one pound in the last 2 weeks, or that my daughter screamed all day because she is teething. Maybe its because my cousin looks better in her swimsuit than me... So many choices. I just want to know where I will be in the next 6 months-and will somebody please tell my neighbor to turn off that damn video game!

Confession #3

I think J is crazy. Literally insane. If you don't know who J is-well she is the person who brought me into this world. I love her with all my heart- But sometimes she says things and my only response is... blink, blink. I know she has stolen prescription meds from family members. She lives on FB. And texts-don't get me started. too late
Normal day 8am-incoming text: hi. honey...
8:30 incoming text: picture of squirrel
9:00 incoming text:aren't you glad your not in Japan
10:30 :why haven't you commented on my FB page
11:45 Please comment on my Fb page
3:30 I think your sister is misbehaving
430-she ran away
return text: m-she is 30. stay out of her life
7:00 did you see my latest post on FB-I think M needs to change yep Dad is coming. Oh my-saw the best movie-are you okay?

Possibly Free

So I am wanting to generate some comments-yes my ego needs the appreciation-even if its to tell me how dumb I am-either way I'd like some visitors. SO... I am thinking about having a giveaway. You heard me: a free gift card to Amazon. Don't worry I wont be asking for personal information. Just want to know if anyone out there might be interested... so leave a comment. And probably next month I will host the giveaway.

All Dolled Up

Felt really good this morning getting ready this morning! A-because I slipped into my jeans, proving that stubborn baby weight is finally coming off...and B- my daughter and look very fashionable for a fraction of the cost:
My ensemble Baby clothes
Gap Trouser Jeans-ebay 10 dollars strawberry onesie-Ross 2.00
Anthropologie top-Goodwill 5.00 pink floral cord cardigan-once upon a child-.99
dior perfume-sample 0 dollars corduroy overalls-olive outlet 15.00
dior lipgloss-ebay 10.00 hairbow-homemade 1.00
lia sophia lacey earrings-ebay 10 dollars strawberry socks-gymboree .99
beige satin flats-Ross 4.49

Confession #2

H is such a great helper. On the weekends especially. Seriously a true piece of gold, he does his fair share. Today, I asked him to take the baby so I could do some spring cleaning. He decided he wanted to clean-so he cleaned the whole house. Scrubbed and everything, then took the baby at 4. Only trouble is, i wanted him to go earlier so I could do it "my way". By 4 I have no energy. And now I have to re-do the pantry later. I know I shouldn't complain. I am super lucky. My confession is, I wanted that time to myself. I like to clean when no one is around. Its my meditation time.

Secret Wish #2

I think I would be a millionaire. Nay, billionaire. If only I could invent it. A virtual taster. It would give you the feeling, taste, and satisfaction of whatever you want to eat-without actually consuming it. Everyone would lose weight! Eat that Willy Wonka with your 3 course gum.

Dream a little dream...

What is it with guys and naughty dreams? Why do they have them all the time? Why do they freak out when they do...and more importantly why do they feel guilty when they see that person? H will never tell me about with whom he is shacking it up with in these dreams. I don't care, I'm not jealous of a night time fantasy. I look forward to the ones with movie stars that I have. Hee hee hee. Is he afraid he'll actually cheat on me because its someone we know? That's ridiculous. I trust him. He says those kind of dreams mess him up, and I'm thinking did you murder her afterwards, was it a guy? Did you do something so kinky even you're not okay with it. And he says no to all of the above-so I'm pensive for a moment, and then I say-so what's the big deal? Its not like you've taken an illicit drug. You certainly haven't cheated on me. And if it messes with you so badly-discuss with a therapist. Oh men, and there constant chain to passions. Its just an emotion. Completely chemical. Chem 101 baby! Stop freaking out, and move on!

sick of pumping

I love my baby, and i want whats best for her. But pumping 7x a day!!!! I feel like a dairy cow. I cannot wait until she is done.

Do you have a secret blog?

Tell me if you do. I want to read all thoughts too.

Confession #1

Sometimes I feel like I have more balls than my significant other. He is always telling me what I should and shouldn't be good at, how I could do this better or that better. And all I can think is, "Hon, I could do your job with ease-and I could do it better. But if you tried to be a Mom-well lets just say nature didn't make a mistake on me."

Have a little tact

H says "Your boobs, like the rest of you are big" and it was meant as a compliment.

J says "Is that profile picture a joke! Its not very flattering." I had just put it up that day, thinking it was pretty damn cute. That'll boost the ol' self-esteem.

K says, "You'll get married soon, I mean its not like you're ugly or anything."

C says, "Oh (my name) you actually look cute today!"

Yes these are actual quotes, and actual people I know.

Secret Wish #1

Just like Walter Mitty, I sit around and dream parts of my life away. Its like that mirror in Harry Potter. It's crazy, but I think many of us do-so I will be including all those crazy wishes I have even though its childish and I am in my thirties. Ooh...spoiler alert. Anyways, today's secret wish is to have the powers of Mary Poppins. I want a magic bag with all that stuff in it. I want the ability to just make my house clean at the flic of a wrist. Not to mention the flying part. Sometimes, I want it so badly I dream about it in my sleep. Its not that much to ask, is it?

I reserve the right...

On this blog I reserve the right to be a hypocrite, dumb, shallow, deep , an intellectual, happy, sad, angry, political, not political, sexist or not, basically anything goes! But I respect your right to say how you feel-we're strangers-so nothing personal can be taken from this. But just remember...I may disagree.

Balance is key...

I am A stable person. Very Balanced. I have all my sugar, spice, and everything nice blogs-my secret, is that I write them all down in my journal, secrets that is. I figure, there are other women out there who are dying to share theirs as well. Maybe men too, although-men CAUTION- I won't always play nice with your sex-but feel free to leave your comments. I am happily married, least any one get the wrong idea, I just need a place to connect with others about the hardships of the human condition. More particularly, being a wife, mother, and citizen of the world. Obviously, the blog is anonymous.